Even Jesus did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many. Excerpted from Mark 10:45
We talk a lot about servant’s hearts, and when it is fairly balanced between TheGorgeous Redhead and me it works just great.
A couple years ago, however, I experienced a time when the servant’s heart was deeply tipped in her favor and I became the recipient of unconditional service by my bride.
It hurts my sense of what’s right for me to lie about and have to depend on her for virtually everything in my life. I’ll explain.
In January two years ago, I finally succumbed to the encouragement I’d had for years and scheduled knee replacement on my left knee. It was a victim of running 2500 miles a year for a bunch of years and pitching fast-pitch softball for 44 years. It was time…OK, past time.
The surgery went well, and as soon as I could climb up and down 2 steps they stoked me full of pain meds and sent me home.
We lived in a 100+ year old home with about 4-6 steps up to the house no matter which door we entered. I had to have help getting from the car to the house, up the stairs and into bed
2 weeks in bed with a catheter, Nurse Ratchet coming by to do physical terrorist (uh therapy) things. Got the staples out.
Difficulty getting up to go to the bathroom, could not shower, and then had to begin walking around and around the house on a walker with tennis ball feet
Finally got the catheter out and was able to shower with plastic taped around the incision.
Then came in early February what became known as Snowmageddon. Temperatures plunged below zero (almost never happens in North Texas.
Now for the particulars:
- I’ve had to have help dressing
- I’ve had to have help showering
- I couldn’t go up and down stairs without help
- I couldn’t help with household chores
- I couldn’t carry out the trash
- For awhile I could not drive and I was as useless as an udder on a snake.
- Then at 2:30am on a subzero night, our doorbell rang. I struggled out of bed and got my trusty walker and hobbled to the front door where I was met with two city workers who told me we had water pouring out from underneath our pier and beam home. They asked me if I’d like them to turn it off at the meter. Absolutely.
- Fortunately we still has electricity and could keep our bedroom habitable while the rest of the house hovered around 40 degrees.
- The following day, my Gorgeous Redhead had to get several big strong guys to move me to our almost finished new home we had built after the City bought our old home. They moved me into the guest room and my Sweetheart had to go orchestrate the rest of the move from the old home. I was useless.
In short, I was almost totally dependent upon Barb for everything. I had nothing to give her in return. I’m accustomed to at least some modicum of Quid pro Quo in our relationship, and there I was helplessly dependent on her to care for me.
I am a pleaser by nature and to have to be a receiver is very hard for me. While this was a difficult time for me, I was and am blessed beyond words with a bride who serves without thought of reciprocity or expectation.
While I struggled with my own incapacity, I was and am truly blessed with a mate who gets the Servant’s Heart.
Try it. It’s unconditional, without predicate and is never off duty. You’ll be amazed what it will do for your relationship.
When was the last time you went out of your way to serve your spouse? Here’s the trick: 1) Drop the “What’s in it for me?’ garbage and get with “How can I serve you best?” 2) Figure out what blesses your spouse and then do it often and do it well.
Go get busy. Start with just one random act of kindness a day and see how many of them you can add as you get better at it. I promise, your wife or your hubby will love you for it.
Right now I’m going to the kitchen to make hot tea just the way Red likes it. My first random act of kindness for today.